Everything old is new again

I'd like you to meet the anti-me. She's the ying to my yang. The sunshine to my rain. The get-up-and-go to my got-up-and-went. I wouldn't be caught dead in a pair of shorts with anything written across my cheeks -- but this 85 year-old pulls it off and then some. I wish I could say that she inspires me -- but I'm so dazzled by her razzle that I can't get up off the sofa. You go, Dorothy!

The picture of grace

Did I mention that I'm not aging gracefully? When I was younger, I remember going over photos in magazines of gorgeous movie stars of a certain age and saying in the most dismissive tone, she's had some work done. And now I think, so what if she has? You go, girl!

I get it. You hit a certain point in your life when it isn't going to get better. You're not going to drop a few pounds and find out there was a rockin' body hidden beneath that flab. You're middle-aged! Your metabolism -- what you have left of it -- is working against you. I'm generally ok with what I look like. I say, go with what you got, sister! It just don't get any better than this!

The other day I found two white hairs (not gray -- we're talking snowy white owl WHITE!) in the base of my left eyebrow. Without hesitation I grabbed the tweezers and whipped those bad boys out of there. Good riddance. Until I realized that I now have a hole in the middle of my eyebrow. Oh! My left eyebrow looks like it has an eye -- like a tadpole swimming above my eye. This is not good. If I was a guy, I'd think about the temporary use of an eye patch because it would make me mysterious and sexy. Unfortunately, an eyepatch doesn't do the same thing for a middle-aged chick. Besides, my eyesight isn't so hot with two eyes working for me -- I don't want to limit my options for vanity's sake. I'd probably get in a car accident.

Later that same day, I noticed a zit growing up under my chin. And this sucker's huge. I would estimate that it could be compared to an aircraft carrier or the entire Rocky Mountain range in size. A lot of territory is involved. And it seems to have plans to make my under-chin a permanent home. It's not going away any time soon. In the meantime, while most people are unable to see it -- it has caused my chin to take on a decidedly pointed appearance. Let me just say that I fear that someone at work is going to ask me if I commute to work on my own broom. Yeah, it's that bad.

I have one happy thought that is comforting me through all of this. At least I know what I'm doing for a Halloween costume. I'm either going to be a pirate or a witch. Depends on which problem I'm still dealing with at the end of October.

The love that we shared in September

Today is my mom's birthday -- so Roxy joins me in sending big birthday wishes up to the Leelanau. I miss my mom. I miss being in Leland at this time of year. September and October, or as I like to call them, "Octember" is my absolute favorite time of year. In Leelanau County, it always works out that the leaves aren't at the height of their color by my mom's birthday, but by my birthday at the end of October, it's all over. My mom and I have decided that the optimum "leaf-peeping" time in Leelanau is the weekend in between our two birthdays. That's when the sun is warm during the day and the air is crisp in the evenings -- and the long golden rays of afternoon sunshine are magical. Anything can happen! Anything! And usually, I'm eating my weight in candy corn. I like to go down to the Leland Dam and watch the fish jump. That's where I buy my candy corn -- at the Dam Candy Store. And then I watch the salmon try to swim upstream. After that I like to wander back home and make some applesauce and then maybe curl up with something good to read...or watch. It just doesn't get much better.