Friday, June 6, 2014
Pa Ingalls: Hipster Sex Symbol
It has come to my attention that there is a new hipster trend that makes me realize I am officially old and out of touch with what is 'cool'. I was okay with the tattoos, but I didn't want one. I was a little intrigued by the ombre hair dying trend, but it seemed in opposition to covering my grey hairs. High-waisted jeans? Been there, done that. But I just don't understand the new obsession with beards.
I'm not talking about neatly groomed facial hair. (It should be noted that The HMA sports facial hair. It makes him even more handsomer.) What I'm talking about is the trend that has men growing facial hair that makes them look like Pa Ingalls. (See above photo with the missus. Pa's on the left.)
I've always thought that Billy Gibbons of ZZ Top was a fine guitarist and singer/songwriter, but sex symbol? Not. Turns out he was way a head of the trend, because now every hot young man I see is sporting an out of control beard that makes him look like he's living in a little house on the prairie. Beards are better. Right? If it's on BuzzFeed, it must be true.
And I am a die-hard hockey fan. It is playoff beard season. Now is when you can see physical evidence of who is a grizzled veteran, and who is a 'barely a few whiskers on his chiny-chin-chin' rookie. I respect the playoff beard, but this non-playoff beard trend is something else altogether.
When I was at the Romantic Times Convention in New Orleans last month, there were a half dozen cover models floating around in the lobby bar on any given day. One of them was built like a body builder -- with long, flowing whiskers dribbling down his chest. I found myself enamored of him. Was I repulsed or attracted? I couldn't decide. It did remind me that it had been a long time since I had read any Tolstoy. Maybe I should give "War & Peace" another chance.